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2018-04-25T20:23:39.826Z
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{"feed":"The-Onion","feedTitle":"The Onion","feedLink":"/feed/The-Onion","catTitle":"Entertainment","catLink":"/cat/entertainment"}

Emmy-winning drama The Handmaid’s Tale returns to Hulu for a second season today, charting a fictional descent into dystopian sexism in the wake of the real-world #MeToo movement and rise of authoritarianism. What do you think?

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WASHINGTON—Experiencing searing abdominal pain brought on by the healthy fare, President Trump reportedly suffered horrible indigestion Wednesday, the morning after he ate a fresh, well-prepared meal at his first state dinner. “Ugh, my God—why the hell did I eat all that garbage last night?” said the wincing, sweating…

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FOXBOROUGH, MA—Assuring fans and reporters that his football career was far from over, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady revealed Wednesday that humanity would perish long before he retires. “You can’t take anything for granted in the NFL, but I’m taking care of my body, and I plan to keep playing football…

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CLIFTON, NJ—Revealing that by the time most American mothers notice their sons’ activities it is already too late, a report published Wednesday by SurveyUSA claims that the majority of maternal parents aren’t paying sufficient attention to 80 percent of the cool things the nation’s boys do. “Whether at playgrounds,…

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RAIFORD, FL—Saying that the disciplinary measure would make the prisoner think twice the next time, Union Correctional Institution warden Roy Connaught said Wednesday he figured a week in solitary confinement ought to teach inmate Ethan Williams not to be schizophrenic. “I reckon a stretch in the hole might show Ethan…

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SAN DIEGO—Aghast at what apparently passes for parental supervision these days, theatergoing sources reported Wednesday that, oh, Jesus Christ, someone actually brought their kid to this thing. “Great. Now there’s some…some child making all this noise and running around, and I have no idea when or even if I’m supposed…

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Nabi Tajima has passed away in Araki, Japan at the age of 117. Born on April 4, 1900, she was the last known person to be born in the 19th Century (which technically ended on January 1, 1901). What do you think?

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WASHINGTON—Zigzagging through the State Dining Room in an effort to avoid bath time, a naked Eric Trump ran through his father’s first state dinner Tuesday pursued by a screaming au pair, White House guests have confirmed. The official ceremony to honor visiting French president Emmanuel Macron was reportedly…

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Fox News commentator Sean Hannity has been linked to a web of shell companies that used millions in HUD assistance to buy more than 870 homes—a relationship that Hannity never disclosed despite HUD Director Ben Carson’s recent appearance on his show. What do you think?

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WASHINGTON—Explaining that he found the discrepancies “delightful” and “nothing to be embarrassed about,” Emmanuel Macron admitted during a chat with American leaders Tuesday that he was charmed by the little differences between Islamophobia in France and the United States. “In a broad sense, our cultures both share a…

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NASHVILLE, TN—Shouting to make themselves heard over the blasting music and the other bellowing drunks, the nation’s 12.6 million intoxicated strangers announced plans to agree definitively and completely with anything one another said, inebriated sources repeatedly confirmed Tuesday. “Fuck yeah, dude, you’re totally…

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The high-profile investigations by Special Counsel Robert Mueller and FBI officials into members of the Trump administration has put federal law enforcement in the spotlight. The Onion presents a guide to how FBI investigations work.

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Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been obsessed with college sports. Over the years, I’ve bonded with my buddies as we watched last-second comebacks and heart-wrenching defeats, cheering on our favorite teams. These days, though I remain a diehard North Carolina Tar Heels fan, I’ve reached a point where I can no longer…

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King Mswati III has changed the name of Swaziland to the Kingdom of eSwatini, meaning “place of the Swazi” in the Swazi language. What do you think?

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