Favored by conservative circles and denigrated by progressives, workfare is having resurgence — with a twist. The Trump Administration this week announced that it would allow states to demand some sweat equity from able-bodied recipients of public health care. Kentucky got the green light on Friday, becoming the first ever to require “an estimated 350,000 Medicaid recipients to work, get job training, volunteer or care for a family member in order to qualify for benefits,” according to NPR. Social leans optimistic on the change, and the work requirement gets 55 percent positive sentiments. Other states in line for the necessary work requirement permits include Arizona, Arkansas, Indiana, Kansas, Maine, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Utah and Wisconsin. All but one of them has a Republican governor. –Hugo Guzman
Republished from 30dB
Well After Williams
this is just to say
I ate your popcorn
necklace, forgive me
of morning light
Read more of Dennis Mahagin’s poems.
Interested in submitting poetry to The Good Men Project? Check out our guidelines.
Photo by timo burghes/Flickr
Few of us will ever have the opportunity to spend an extended period of time on an Indian reservation. If you don’t live or work there, it’s just not something you’re likely to do. You might drive onto native lands for a festival or to buy some crafts, or you might enjoy some vacation time at an Indian casino. If you ever do have the invitation to fully immerse yourself in the culture of tribal ways, I recommend you walk through the open door.If you embrace the opening of that door, you will be changed.
My wife and I recently spent a week volunteering at the Fort Mojave Indian Tribe, a federally recognized sovereign nation that sits at the three-way intersection of California, Arizona, and Nevada. We were there for a week as part of an alumni service project from my college with a group of about 50 like-minded souls. We were divided into three groups focused on construction, education, and business projects....
So seniors are you ready to reap the benefits of breathing life into your dry bones Are you ready to pursue opportunities to continue to influence and lead? Are you a late Salvation Army Commissioner Brengle recommended ready to “keep the draught open; clean the ashes out; keep putting in fuel?” Are you ready to keep your fire burning and come alive again?
An 82-year-old friend of mine is a perfect example where this is occurring. At his age, he would be the first to admit that his body may be slowing down, but he would also be one to admit that he sees himself as someone who has a responsibility for leading, mentoring and equipping. He is not ready to give this up.
He is alive and he continues to fuel his passion. In fact, he is so committed that after four years of thoughtful reflection, he is working in collaboration with others to establish missional communities in a new area of our city.
There are no dry bones...
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I ate lunch the other day with a group of women and men, most of whom were married. They all seemed to be in their mid-thirties and early forties.
Two men joked with each other about communicating with their wives and what it would be like to have multiple wives, as if they were opting for polygamy. They both shook their heads and decided it would be terrible because they’d need to be mind readers and make a lot more money, have more patience and time, and be much nicer.
Sitting beside them, I jumped in and said, “I don’t think women want mind readers. I think they want communicators. Most of us want to talk.”
“I think men are the group, if we are speaking categorically, who want mind readers. They often don’t want to be vulnerable or speak intimately. They usually want their wives and girlfriends to get it, know it, and believe it already, without a lot of talking,” I remarked.
Other people at the table then joined our discussion.
The discussion became very rich. One woman expressed that it’s challenging for her to express herself to her boyfriend and she wishes he could read her mind. So, I...
I write this for my children and their children as well as for yours. Global Warming may not affect our lives. If we aren’t in the path of a virulent hurricane, tornado, wildfire, flash flood, Tsunami, earthquake, and or drought, and our home doesn’t sit on a scenic coastline, flood plain, or island, we’re going to be just fine.
It is a fact that burning fossil fuels causes emissions that increase the density of our atmosphere and keep the heat from escaping into space. The oil, gas, and coal emissions give off carbon dioxide. With no place to go, it saturates the air we breathe, compromising our health. It saturates our water, creating carbonic acid, and kills off species of fish and plankton on which aquatic creatures feed.
In addition, the emissions forming the barrier around the earth, keep the heat and radiation in, much like a car, in winter, sitting in the sun. The atmospheric heat bounces back to earth and warms the...
It’s Thanksgiving; the beginning of the Holiday Season. The gathering of family and friends is usually a recipe for happy times. Typically, we express our gratitude for the blessings and good fortunes we have in our lives. For some of you, it may be the only time during the year that you take a moment to consider what you have to be grateful for. But on the other hand, the season may trigger feelings of depression, making it difficult to realize any pleasure in the holidays. In truth, when it’s mild depression or uneasiness, expressions of gratitude can be one of the best antidepressants existing today.
Gratitude is not just for the religious nor should it be classified as some “woo-woo” act that has little to do with reality. Expressing gratitude brings into play a host of other emotions – feelings of charity and well being – that are all tremendously important to our mental and physical well being....
SILVER SPRING, Md. — Ever since Jasmin’s husband, retired Marine Corps Capt. Wally Blair, sustained a traumatic brain injury (TBI) when his convoy hit a roadside bomb, she has served as his caregiver. “I view myself more as a spouse [who] wants to help her husband lead a fulfilling life,” Jasmin said. “My goal every day is just to know that when we close down for the night to go to bed, we have let him lead a normal day and be productive.”
The Blairs share their story in a new video released today in recognition of Warrior Care Month by A Head for the Future, a Department of Defense (DoD) initiative to help raise awareness of TBI prevention, symptoms and treatment. The video is available online at dvbic.dcoe.mil/aheadforthefuture and on the Defense Centers of Excellence for Psychological Health and Traumatic Brain Injury’s YouTube channel.
The DoD Office of Warrior Care Policy initiated Warrior Care Month in November 2008 to honor the courage of wounded, ill or injured service members, recognize various wounded warrior programs and highlight stories of recovery and personal triumphs.
“This Warrior Care Month, we’re honoring injured service members and their families, as well as those who care for them,” said Scott Livingston, director of education at the Defense...
Available on Amazon.
This isn’t fair. For sanity’s sake, you try not to think about this guy. For sanity’s sake, if you’re like everybody I know and pretty much everybody you know, you throw yourself into personal pursuits, counting down the days to 2020 like a prisoner marking the days on a wall calendar.
And now there’s a book with 319 photos of Barack Obama, culled from millions of images taken from before you heard of him to the final day of his presidency.
If you’re one of the 1.5 million people who follow the Instagram account of Pete Souza, who was Obama’s official photographer, you’ve seen some of these photos.
If you don’t follow Pete Souza, you’re now likely to see these pictures often, for this is a book that friends will give to people who are nostalgic for a President with a solid marriage, role-model children, and an...
When I saw this picture posted in my stream earlier yesterday, there were plenty of people (okay, mostly men) who took away from the image, the idea that men being more empathetic meant somehow they were not willing to go to work, wanted to sit at home and get high while their women go out and get make money.
What lazy and unimaginative trolling. Why is it a crime when a man wants to interact with his children? Why is it wrong for a man to be tender and supportive? How does this make him less than a heroic individual? Hollywood much?
Who decided the best thing a man could do was to work himself to an early grave under the pretense that his presence was less important than being there for his family? Better to die, worked to death than to be there for your family? Better to die than to learn to clean house, wash a dish, cook a meal, do laundry because those are women’s work?
Question: Do you believe in soulmates? Can you define what it actually means to someone who may be skeptical?
Answer:I think your skepticism is valid. There are a lot of definitions out there that set people up to fail and to think they’re less than enough if they haven’t found that ONE person or if they don’t spend the REST of their life with that one person.I don’t buy it.However I do believe there are special souls who have made agreements to come together in this lifetime to grow and evolve and heal.We tend to feel that we know these people already even though we just met. There is usually an instant attraction, quite often an intense attraction, a KNOWING. Sometimes these soulmate relationships last a lifetime or at least a long time. Yet others are more of an explosion of growth and then goodbye! Just because you come together meaningfully and intensely to grow does NOT mean it’s necessarily comfortable!In fact I believe my two ex-husbands were my soulmates! I grew so much in my relationships with both of them, yet it wasn’t pretty or easy. I see them as my master spiritual teachers and I’m so grateful for the shadows they revealed...
I was biking home one night, and came to a busy Los Angeles intersection. Six lanes of traffic each way. The light had been green for a while, so I knew I had to hurry to make it across the intersection. I biked past two rows of cars stopped for the red light, and in the lane closest to the curb was a car making a right turn on red. Except, the driver had seemingly forgotten the “after stop” part of the “right turn on red after stop”. He was speeding to get around the corner, and I was speeding to get across the street. This was not a good mix.
Luckily, I’ve bicycled long to know to watch out for cars just like that one. But I was annoyed. After all, you’re supposed to stop at a red light. Not stopping could kill someone. Someone like me. It’s abusive, entitled behavior.
By the time the driver saw me and decided that maybe he would stop after all, he was halfway around the corner and the back half of his car covered the crosswalk. I didn’t swerve around his car, but bicycled straight up to his window and said “You’re supposed to stop at a red light.”
What did I hope to accomplish? I was hoping that maybe if I...
Muhammad Ali once explained why the idea that there were some decent white people wasn’t a useful argument for him. Suppose there were ten thousand snakes, most of which were venomous, in the next room. Should he hope that the non-venomous snakes would protect him, or should he close the door?
Last year, Donald Trump Jr. compared terrorists among Syrian refugees to poisoned Skittles: You don’t know which ones will kill you, so it’s not worth taking the risk.
Meanwhile, people defending laws requiring transgender and non-binary people to use the bathrooms that align with the gender on their birth certificate argue that sexual predators will use tolerance of transgender people as an excuse to sneak into bathrooms and molest girls.
Superficially, it looks like these are comparable comparisons, and that liberals...
By Liz Higgins, LMFTA
The word “marriage” has a negative connotation for many people. One contributing factor to this is the high divorce rate among baby boomers, impacting the way millennials view the institution of marriage as a whole. There’s also the movement away from the more traditional practice of marrying for religious reasons, financial concerns with the cost of getting married, and simply not wanting to give up an independent, single lifestyle.
The average age for first marriages is now 27 for women and 29 for men, compared to 20 for women and 23 for men in 1960. Interestingly, more couples than ever are moving in together before (or in lieu of) getting married.
As a result, many couples now find themselves in a sea of uncertainty when it comes to tying the knot. Should we wait? If so, for how long? Should we even get married?
If you find yourself sitting on the other side of the fence than your partner, know that...
Feminism has been getting a bad rap in modern media. The idea women should be able to advocate for seeing more women in positions of authority and responsibility in the workplace seems diametrically opposed to the treatment they are currently on the receiving end of, which is often sexist, misogynistic and discriminatory in the extreme.
How did the idea of fair treatment of women somehow come to mean discrimination against men? Sexism is becoming harder to recognize, it has become more insidious. A “can’t put my finger on it but I know it when I see it” kind of thing making it problematic for women to get recognition for their efforts.
With “bro-culture” clearly evident in the technology industry, it has become endemic for this industry to police itself better, but if current trends are any indication, this transformation is likely to take decades.
What will it take to change the toxic formation of bro-culture, which has extremely sexist tendencies, without making it seem as...
The proliferation of apps has enabled consumers to obtain items and experiences instantly with a few keystrokes and swipes of a smartphone. Lyft makes it easier for people to hail rides, Caviar makes it easier for people to order food, and Venmo makes it easier to pay people; dating apps do not make it easier for people to date. Unlike pizzas and cab rides, people are not commodities that are interchangeable.
Everyone is different and every facet of courting, communication and engagement is unique not only to each person but more so to the dynamic combination of two people yielding unlimited combinations of feelings, responses, interpretations, expectations and chemistry. There is no blueprint to succeed in dating; there are exceptions to every rule and no matter how much effort you put into screening people, fine-tuning your wish-list of characteristics and identifying your deal-breakers, you will never be able to shield yourself 100% from heartbreak, ghosting, spammers or toxic people. However, you can definitely minimize exposure to such instances...
It’s interesting how we travel through time…
We go from age ten, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, sixty and beyond into our older years, because number-wise, our age always continuously progresses. But, essentially, our age never affects who we are truly and regardless of how much we may age. The core being of who we authentically are remains the same. Simply put, we are who we are and the rest of time is only a mere accumulation of memories.
In essence, we are a receptacle of life. We contain everything within us that’s transpired throughout our lives day after day, year after year. Every memory of achievement, victory, struggle, disappointment, injury and moment of insecurity is documented and when lumped altogether forms a nice, neat unique little package called “You.”
Many people hide behind the powerful, fabricated, fictionalized images they’ve created, only choosing to reveal fashioned versions of themselves to the external world. They’ve become experts in concealing what’s contained beneath the surface, and keeping who they really are hidden within a neat little package and shielded away from outside view.
A powerful external appearance hardly means brave…
The term “Powerful” cannot merely be defined through perfectly chiseled images or the “Ring-leaders of illusion” who...
With the recent succession of high-powered men sinking into the abyss of shame as a result of their past indiscretions, I can’t help but think of what has nourished this collective behavior for eons. That machismo wins the day. That “manning up,” that is to say, showing no weakness whatsoever, will triumph over all. What we’ve seen however, is the exact opposite. As these men continue to double-down and deny-till-they die, we (read: the populace that has either brought them to power through adulation, election, or otherwise) witness their masculinity shrivel faster than we can understand. It’s as though by acting tougher, they become weaker.
Because the masculinity our predecessors have tried to instill upon us has ignored the fact that humans have weaknesses. We’re not perfect. We fail. We make mistakes. The male sex is not immune to folly, but by powering through or over the problems that get set in motion by our own misdeeds—which is what we have been taught to do for so long—we bury them in our psyches only to have them grow, eventually erupt, and kill us in the end.
So, what’s the fix?
Instead of manning up, why not gentleman up? Exercise discipline....
I’ve been doing so much fighting lately. Fighting for sales, fighting for position, fighting for survival, fighting for sleep. This has been the story of my life—fighting for my right to exist in this world.
This is the opposite of what I’m here to do. I’m here to flow. I’m here to bring peace and comfort. I forget that I don’t have anything to prove. I forget that I don’t have to earn a thing. I was gifted with everything I need and more, before I arrived on this planet. I simply need to trust in that fact. More importantly, I need to surrender to it.
The times when I have trusted myself and followed my intuition, I have been rewarded without measure. And yet, I cling to this old story and pattern as if it feeds me, because it has—until now. Never mind that the way this old story has served me has not been in a positive way. It served me in lack, depression, anger, fear, codependency, suppression, repression, and as a general hinderance to success and abundance.
In this moment, I choose to forgive everyone who harmed me. I choose to forgive those who ignored and neglected me. I choose to forgive those who turned a blind eye to my gifts and refused to acknowledge...
Bravery does not consist of being fearless. Bravery is being full of fear, embracing it, moving toward what we fear most and DOING IT ANYWAYS.
A considerable difference between the way I lived life previously and how I live today, is I’ve allowed fear to become a personal and positive driving force in my life. In the past, fear literally held me captive and left me feeling paralyzed in all sorts of various states of extreme distress, disorder, panic, tension and anxiety. I felt helplessly overwhelmed at the mere mention of trying something new or God forbid anything outside my comfort zone,
but today I live a completely different story…
Now any time I feel the sensation of fear arise, I view it as an invaluably opportune moment to move closer toward understanding my life’s purpose and the choices I can make to expand my life in better ways and push myself further into realizing the potential greatness of my capabilities. I no longer freak out. Instead, I pause and check-in with myself and how I am feeling. I silently inquire within, “Why am I actually afraid to do...