I don’t believe there’s a word in the english dictionary that could define how hot Adrianna Gutierrez is. Maybe a mama mia or aye dios mio is more fitting but I would need a second opinion from one of my foreign friends before fully classifying this sizzling señorita as such. She really must have a hard life. I can’t imagine what it would be like being born so desirable. She’s so hot it looks like it hurts. I’m more than willing to assist her with comfort if that truly is the case. I’d shield her from all of the redundant compliments that she receives on a daily basis. Keeping a list close by on a clipboard to let strangers know she’s at her limit for the day with the word beautiful and to please pick another adjective when describing this fine young woman.

Ariadna looks amazing in anything she puts on or takes off. From blue jean jackets to bikinis this lady is a blessing to look at. I hope such an angel is up for being my guardian because I can use some verbal direction from a very heavenly face. It would enhance my life by leaps and bounds.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA / Pacific Coast News

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I truly believed that Kristin Cavallari couldn’t possibly get any more attractive than she already is. Then she threw on a red dress with what looks like a ribbon and reached inferno levels of hotness that only the devil himself could handle. After seeing her in her amazing little outfit my heart was racing faster than the time I had to chase the chickens after they escaped from their coop. Cavallari is far past just being considered cute. Kristen is steamy, dreamy, and one of the best looking women with blonde hair these 50 states of freedom has possibly ever seen. Even if the waiting list for her love took me my entire life just to get my turn I would still sign up without any hesitation.

I wonder what I would have to do to get her attention. I know she’s a busy celebrity but she also has my mind busy with thoughts of her and I living our best lives together. Maybe I could schedule an appointment and she can pencil me in. I’ve decided after seeing someone so beautiful our life paths should no longer be parallel. We should be intersecting  individuals, perpendicular people, or just meet up and possibly cross paths at some point.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA / Splash News

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The battle of which blonde is better is back again and I couldn’t be more excited. I’ve been obsessing over Brandi Glanville for the longest time but I’m going to keep any biases I may have at bay here and be completely objective. Lindsey Vonn probably has one of the most lovable faces a lady could ever own. Seeing her smile is more refreshing than sipping from a jar of sun brewed sweet tea after an honest day’s work. Obsessions and infatuations aside this is still going to be another toss up for me. And it might as well be a two headed coin I’m flipping with both ladies calling heads in an effort to help me fairly decided who’s hotter. They’re both winners either way you slice the pie.

I actually need a moment of silence just to fully take in how good Brandi looks in a suit jacket. I had no idea that a female dressed so formally could be so seductive at the same time. It almost doesn’t make sense and I need to have a seat because I feel like I’m losing my breath looking at such a hot woman. Add Lindsey to the list of choices and I’m officially at a loss for words.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA

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The future just got a lot bleaker thanks to the announcement that British anthology series Black Mirror has been renewed for a fifth season on Netflix. The series began with two three-episode series on Channel 4 back in 2011 and 2013 before gaining substantial popularity here in the States on Netflix. Apparently the show has found its audience because hot on the heels of December’s season four premiere, Netflix has decided to gift us with another round of depressing morality tales later this year.

I must admit that even as a die hard fan of the show, I have yet to watch any of the season four episodes yet. Too much end of the year Oscar movie nonsense kept me from catching up with it, but it’s definitely on my list of things to do. I’m especially curious about the Star Trek-esque episode with Meth Damon and Liam McPoyle.

What do you guys think? Are you excited that we’ll soon be swimming in more bleak and solemn tales about the pitfalls of technology? Do you think, as I do, that Black Mirror is the heir apparent to The Twilight Zone? Sound off in the comments section below!

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If you were to ask me to name the Disney films that should never, under any circumstances, be remade or get a belated sequel, 1964’s Mary Poppins would be at or near the top of the list. It’s as close to a perfect film as has ever been made and there’s absolutely no reason to try and recapture that magic. This is Disney, though, and they’re aching to make money on any little bit of nostalgia they can, so we all knew they were gonna do this, whether we wanted them to or not.

The good news is that they cast the absolute perfect person in the title role—and sadly, no, it’s not Yondu. Emily Blunt steps into the iconic role made famous by Julie Andrews in the upcoming Mary Poppins Returns. Now, for those of you who’ve already doused your pitchforks in gasoline and are ready to light them, I have a bit of news that’s sure to make you reconsider. Lin-Manuel Miranda is playing a character named Jack, so while he’s clearly playing the Bert role, it’s not actually Bert. So don’t get your nostalgia panties in a bunch.

Now, on the outside chance none of this brought a smile to your face, I recommend this Mary Poppins trailer for a film we’ll sadly never, ever see. But it’s fun to dream…

The post Emily Blunt is...

This is why you gotta cast Mark Hamill in the sequel. Really drive home the whole Amazonian thing.

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In a year that lacked a clear front-runner from minute one, the year in film for 2017 came to a close last night when the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences handed out its annual awards and crowned director Guillermo Del Toro and his film The Shape of Water the best of the best. The fantasy film with more than a few nods to “Old Hollywood” nabbed four awards, making it the big winner of the night.

In fact, only two Best Picture nominees went home totally empty handed: Greta Gerwig’s Lady Bird and Steven Spielberg’s The Post. Call Me By Your Name grabbed the award for Best Adapted Screenplay, finally giving legendary 89-year old filmmaker James Ivory his first statuette. Jordan Peele took the Best Original Screenplay award for his directorial debut Get Out. Gary Oldman and the team of makeup artists that transformed him into Winston Churchill both took home Oscars for their work in Darkest Hour.

Dunkirk nabbed some well-deserved technical awards for Editing, Sound Mixing, and Sound Editing, while Phantom Thread was recognized for its Costume Design. Even the people who hated Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri were forced to admit the performances were great, which is how it went home with two awards: Frances McDormand for Best Actress and my boo, Sam Rockwell, for Best Supporting Actor.

Outside the Best Picture race, Allison Janney joined Rockwell in the “Won on the First...

The beach and beautiful women go hand in hand. I’m starting to lose count the more I try to keep up. But there is one lady who has a face I could never forget and that’s Celeste. By trade she claims to only be a model but a beauty queen like her has to be involved in way more than just showing her amazing body off. She can add lifeguard to her resume after I toss myself into shallow water to either get her attention or to get her to jump in and save me. That has to be one of my top five fantasies. Being saved by Celeste in shallow water. Her arm wrapped around me as she swims to the shore and certain safety. I keep hitting the replay button in my head on that one.

A lady like her is just my type. Looking at her swimming trunks and beach towel it’s clear to see that she also has a sense of humor. Maybe we could be the first couple in history to do a stand-up comedy routine on the beach. It’d be loads of laughter and a memory worth cherishing. The best bonding between any two people always occurs at the beach. There’s no way she wouldn’t want to be with me after a great day together at the beach.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA

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Every time I look at Gigi Hadid I appreciate the fact that I was born a human. There were so many possibilities. I could have easily been born any of the animals I tend to on a regular basis. But by the grace of the good lord I’m able to fully observe and understand what perfection in the form of a woman looks like. Gigi is probably one of the best dressed women that I’ve seen in a long time. I know that may not add up to much when most women around my way wear whatever they find first in their closet. Hadid looks like she takes her time and carefully crafts each outfit for the day before stepping outside. I’d write her a letter to personally thank her for her excellent choice of clothes if I had her address or P.O. Box.

Maybe she’ll notice me if I also become a model. As soon as a magazine like Southern Living starts accepting applications I’ll be sure to fill one out. That way Hadid and I will end up in the same circle of friends and she’ll have no choice but to be charmed by macho figure. Your arms can get pretty chiseled from tinkering with tractors all day.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA

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What kind of upkeep is required on hair like that in order to maintain it? My first guess would be to say that it needs a lot because it looks beautiful and I only see it relatively rarely. If it was easy to have then I would expect it to be on every other gal I see. That is usually the way it goes with things that look good, anyways. It becomes so common to see it that it starts to lose its appeal until it eventually falls out of favor completely and thus starts the never ending cycle over again.

Regardless of the amount of effort that goes into her hair, I appreciate that Keyla McNeely has it. There a lot of hairstyles that freak me out, and I consider it a bad move for a model to have anything on their body that would cause someone to look away. I mean, the whole point of being a model is to have all eyes on her. I cannot imagine whichever company she is representing would be thrilled to have their product ignored because she chose to style her hair into the shape of a skunk.


Photo Credit: Backgrid USA

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I’ve had some pretty tough decisions to make in my life but this one may be the toughest by far. Bianca Blanco or Melissa Bolona? Blanco is a heap of hotness rolled into a tiny package. Even her outfit is helping her reach a level of hot not many women know exist. Then there’s Bolona who looks like a bunch of beautiful flowers set on fire in a vibrant dress. She’s scorching and awesome to look at. Figuring out which lady is hotter would have probably been easier if I were blindfolded. Because it’s almost impossible to pick only one after seeing both women side by side. Only a madman would admit to one woman being hotter than the other.

I tried observing their choice of clothing to help me decide a winner but both ladies have brought out their closet’s best for the night. I must admit Blanco’s fur scarf is pretty seductive and I almost sided with her because of it. But then I noticed the detailing on the end of Bolona’s dress and came to the conclusion that it was a nifty touch. Back to square one again. I wish there was an equation I was able to use in order to figure out which woman brings more heat to the table.

Photo Credit: Splash News 

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The wait is finally over! Mr. Skin’s 19th Annual Anatomy Awards are here to celebrate the breast and brightest in film and television nudity over the last year!

Mr. Skin and his crack team of skinvestigators have pored over the best nude scenes from the hottest celebs and selected winners in over 40 categories including Breast Picture, Best Breasts, Best Butt, Best Nudecomer, and many more!

Mr. Skin has also inducted another skin legend into his Hall of Fame with the Lifetime Skinchievement Award thanks to her appealing nude “material” from her storied career!

All this and more await you as you sit back and stand at attention for this year’s Anatomy Award Winners!

Click here for free access to this year’s winning clips

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Oh, Kate, what were you thinking? You cannot just slide your feet into your shoes like they are a pair of slippers. It completely destroys the integrity of the heel. I know that you are a busy woman, but you cannot possibly be so busy that you cannot take an extra ten seconds to put your shoes on the right way. You are supposed to be a role model to young women everywhere, but what kind of example are you setting with this type of behavior? There is a fine line that separates sliding your shoes on from a life of drug addiction and disappointment. I pray you never find out just how fine it is.

And if this turns out to be a clever usage of product placement then all I can say is: Well done. Whatever Nike is paying you certainly is not enough. You deserve to be draped in free Nike apparel from head to toe, and maybe even a gold swoosh necklace. These photos are worth more than a Super Bowl ad and it did not cost them a thing. I fear more of this type of advertising is on the horizon, and I am oddly okay with it.


Photo Credit: Backgrid USA

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Minnesota native Jessie Diggins won one of only nine gold medals for Team USA at last month’s Winter Olympics in PyeongChang, and she’s proving herself a terrific ambassador for both the country and her sport of cross country skiing. The 26 year old beauty and her teammate Kikkan Randall became the first Americans to bring home the gold in cross country skiing and it’s likely to set off a cross country skiing craze across the country… or not.

Jessie, short for Jessica, has been skiing since she was 4, and first began competitive skiing at the age of 11. Those are some pretty impressive statistics, but the sort of thing you see in the narrative of many an Olympic medal winner. She’s definitely not shy about taking advantage of her moment in the spotlight as one of America’s sweethearts, and she fits the bill so perfectly, I’d be fine with her being officially dubbed that.

So next time you find yourself cross country skiing and you’re looking for a little inspiration to help you across the finish line, just think about how cute Jessie is and how proud of you she’d be if you finished. You know, or just stick to a sport you’re good at. But either way, she’s still proud of you.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA

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It’s a good thing Steven Spielberg and John Williams are such good friends because the former can likely borrow any theme he wants from the latter without having to pay outrageous royalties. In this latest TV spot for Spielberg’s upcoming film Ready Player One, we hear Williams’ theme from 1978’s Superman, the kind of thing that’s usually so cost prohibitive, it’s not really common in movies.

I’m beginning to think that’s another huge part of the reason that Spielberg was chosen to direct this film. It has so many references to films and ephemera that Spielberg is associated with that it makes acquiring those royalties much easier. Not to mention all the friends Spielberg has from his decades in the film industry, it was probably worth it for WB to just have him direct it so he could call in endless favors for licensing purposes.

I mean, yeah, sure, he’s a great director and all, but he’s not the right guy for this role as we’ve already established many times before. However, if it was all done so that they could get those rights to all of those things, then at least I’m beginning to understand why they went with him in the first place. Ready Player One opens on March 29.

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It is about time that the styles from the roaring twenties came back around to relevancy. I am grateful that Tessa Thompson decided to take her rightful place at the vanguard of the flapper movement in order to more quickly spur on its acceptance. Although I will say that she took a bit more of a shiny interpretation of it than I was expecting. I suppose it is only right that the future incarnation would look like it was dipped in chrome, but that also makes her look more like a disco ball, which is another period entirely.

She had better be careful and not wear that dress out on the street. If the light hits it just right then she could end up on the business end of a lawsuit due to blinding a driver and causing an accident. It is hard to imagine Tessa’s eyes looking anymore sad than they already naturally do, but if that lawsuit was to happen I imagine we would see them droop a few more degrees. I am not sure how that would affect her vision, but it would make it hell to find a pair of properly fitting glasses.


Photo Credit: Splash News

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I am admittedly not very fashion forward, but I didn’t even know that Puma still made shoes. Sure enough they do, and they’ve got themselves one hell of a spokeswoman in the form of the always gorgeous Selena Gomez. I thought Pumas went out of fashion around the time Selena’s first co-star, Barney the Purple Dinosaur, did but apparently they’re still hip and cool and the kids are all wearing them. Who knew?

I’m thinking that other sneaker companies from the 80s and 90s should try a revival featuring a hot starlet. Maybe Roos could round up Miley Cyrus to show how you can carry a spare condom in your sneaker with Roos. Or maybe Rihanna could do a line of ads for British Knights. I’d buy some of those if they ever came back. Hell, I’d definitely buy a pair of Roos too, those were my jam back in the day.

Anyway, this isn’t going to convince me to buy some Pumas, but it’s definitely a step in the right direction for the company. They’ve managed to grasp on to another shred of relevance. Here’s hoping they ride it all the way to the bank.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Pacific Coast News

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Angela Simmons just snagged my attention when she decided to wear a similar body suit that Uma Thurman wore in Kill Bill. Simmons also happens to be dressed to kill and the sight of her has me fearing for my safety. There’s no way anyone could stare at someone so hot for so long without suffering from temporary blindness. Staring at her is like staring into a soft yellow sun. But her silhouette alone is enough for me to risk my ability to see for the rest of my life. I’ll be a very happy man if she’s the last image burned into my memory if I happen to go blind after getting a good look at her in person. I’ll just have to take a gander and hope for the best.

Everything from the color she’s wearing to her smile brightens up my day. It would be a unique experience walking around with a lady dressed as the yellow Power Ranger in a pair of stilettos. That’s not something you see everyday. She’s possibly the most attractive human in a one piece on the planet. I look nowhere near as good as Angela when I put on a pair of coveralls.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA

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